I never really realized the essence of the saying that as you grow older you learn more. By learning I had always thought of experiences and responsibilities and that you learn to handle your life, you learn from your mistakes and juggle through all your problems.
But I didn’t realize it until now that you can actually learn things. Things you thought you never could do.
When I was younger we used to have this mandatory drawing classes in school and I hated it. Only because I was terrible at it and if you’d see my drawings it would be a painful sight. I’d barely manage to get a C or B only because the subject was negligible and the teacher would be kind enough to let me get away with it. I struggled with drawing my entire middle school which wad painful and discouraging. And as I stepped into high school I was welcomed with relief for that subject had taken a backseat and was no longer a pain in my life.
However, during my senior year I was working at the Print Media club and I was surrounded by illustrators and artists and the room itself was no short of art for the walls of the room were inked with a plethora of emotions. It always moved me and had been the best part of school.
During Founders’ week, for the first time in a long time I held a paintbrush and painted my roll number on the wall and in that moment I felt joy. The joy of having done something which I thought I never could.
When I got back home I looked at my wall and thought ‘why not?’. I could give it a shot as well. And I did. And it made me so happy. It began with me drawing band logos on my wall and now I sketch!
A few days ago I began sketching and I just can’t bring myself to stop! I feel this certain kind of joy when I sketch and it makes me happy and I feel good about myself and now I know I can do something else as well. Art and music has always been influential in my life and now I have a chance to do something with both! I’m discovering more about myself and I’m just happy.
P.S. You can follow my sketches on my Instagram page at emotionallydretached. Do follow and send your love. ❤
Do you ever feel a kind of void at some point of your life? Well, I’ve been feeling this void for a while now and even though I’ve been through this before, every void feels new to me, something that I’ve felt before but not of the same quality. I don’t know how to feel about this or how to get rid of this. Because as empty as it feels it gives you a painful feeling. As if you’re trapped in a box and you can’t get out. I want to cry but I can’t. And even if I did I would rather find it pointless. How long is this void going to last? I’m running out of patience.
The theme for our House farewell party was disclosed to me and my batchmates a month beforehand and it was for the right reasons. Because it happened to be Disney Princesses we did need the time and money to get ourselves our costumes but thankfully we didn’t have to go through the trouble of deciding a princess for ourselves because our lovely juniors had already done that job and made our lives easier. Our exams were also round the corner.
The farewell party was thrown for the 13 of us. While the others were given Elsa, Cinderalla, Tiana and others I was given MULAN! I initially didn’t have an opinion on it and went along to look for tge costume. Only in the last moment did I get my costume stitched and it actually turned out brilliant. Thanks to the tailor.
I looked fine at the party and didn’t matter that much because our juniors did the finest job of setting up the school swimming pool(that was the venue designated to our house) into this really beautiful fairytale ambience.
However my friend Kim took this picture of me and it’s a match made in the fairytales!
Amidst all the anxiety and stress preceding our board exams we couldn’t have asked for a saving grace and in me and my friends’ case two saving graces for that matter. But thankfully for us we found Mew-Mew and our little one-and-a-half handed monkey.
Mew-Mew was initially not Mew-Mew. It started off with Pussy and then to Louka and then to Tikka and then several other names which kept changing after every movie we’d watched or interesting characters from our textbooks. We even went to the extent of calling it Mussolini and for short Lini. Our choices of names were initially feminine because for a very long time we thought and believed it was a she. However after two weeks of benefitting from the doubt it dawned on us that the cat that slept with us, ate with us, basically hung out with us was in fact a he. Nevertheless our affection for it did not diminish and we adored it even more.
But like all good things must come to an end we had to bid Mew-Mew goodbye because of precautions the school authorities wanted to take firsthand.
I terribly miss Mew-Mew and till my last day in school had so wished for it to show up. But you don’t always get what you want right?
And then we have our lovely friend and occasional visitor, voilá, the one-and-a-half handed monkey! Regardless of the fact that it barely bothered to attack us, we were still terrified and wouldn’t dare to get too close to it. But it became the source of entertainment we truly needed and there were actually days when we’d want it to pay us a visit.
I hope they find love in the wilderness.
He stabbed his sword on the ground, his army standing by
Anticipation lingered in the misty air waiting for the cry
The leader stood tall, his senses alerted at best
But the searing pain that hit him was not from the enemy’s crest.
He held his drum sticks firm, inhaling deeply
His heartbeat in rhythm with the powerful bass
The music rolled in perfection
His heart could hear what his ears could not.
She screamed in agony from the pain
That ripped through her womb
Ten years hence her heart still screams
From the cry that was never heard.